Category Archives: Transformation

Farewell to Delphi

“We learn by going where we have to go; we arrive when we find ourselves on the road walking toward us.” – Phil Cousineau, The Art of Pilgrimage

On my last day in Delphi, I found myself back at the Gymnasium sitting at the foot of the ancient olive tree absorbing every last bit of sun as I gazed at the hills below. Despite the resistance I felt before I left on this journey and all along the way, I knew I would miss this sacred place. My first sight of the steep forboding cliffs rising above the Sanctuary, my visceral interactions with the Omphalos, and my vision of Delphi bathed in golden light will remain with me forever. And I’m feeling boundless gratitude for the luxury of just ‘being’ for that period of time with no distractions or obligations.

Pandora by John William Waterhouse, 1896

This adventure started with a serendipitous discovery of the Pythia and grew into an obsession to experience firsthand the world of ancient Delphi. I realized that my desire to ‘feel’ any kind of connection or to garner information about my past here might require some sort of a transformative experience. And while I found the idea of a flash of insight exciting, I didn’t really think I was ready for a total paradigm shift.

Since my return, I’ve wondered if my beliefs limited what I was able to experience. In my deep soul writing, Source has indicated repeatedly that information would be revealed when I’m ready for it. I left home with one question and came back with dozens more. And like Pandora, having opened the proverbial box (which I have learned was actually a jar), all I’m left with is hope – hope that some day I will come to know if it’s possible to connect with aspects of ourselves from previous lifetimes and whether knowing our past serves us in the present.

Great Expectations

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“Man cannot discover new oceans until he has courage to lose sight of the shore.” – unknown

In anticipation of my departure, I’ve been experiencing a myriad of emotions, mostly fear and sadness. The fear no doubt is related to that chat I had with Source a while ago about being tested on this journey. And my clairvoyant friend Angelika warned me when this trip was just a fantasy that I could make all the plans all I wanted, but Spirit would have final say in the way things would unfold. And the sadness? Well, I have a premonition that nothing will be the same when I return.

But according to writer, teacher, travel leader, and documentary filmmaker Phil Cousineau who has been on the road all his life, this is exactly what can be expected when one sets out on a soulful journey. In his book, The Art of Pilgrimage, he recounts innumerable stories about pilgrims, sojourners and explorers who have traversed the globe throughout the millennia.

Siting Muriel Rukeyser’s essay, The Life of Poetry, Cousineau compares the fear of soulful travel to resistance to modern poetry. “A poem invites you to feel. More than that: it invites you to respond. And better than that: a poem invites a total response. So too with powerful and soulful travel. It seizes your imagination, but the way through to the sacred moment can also be through deep anxiety about the unknown. The possibility produces fear in many travelers, even at the threshold of their own door before leaving home.”

What am I expecting to find at Delphi? If given the choice, I would wish for a transformative experience analogous to that of Henry Miller, who was so moved by his travels through Greece that the account of his journey, The Colossus of Maroussi, “streamed from the heavens” straight into his soul. I couldn’t ask for anything more than that.

So, I am off at last. I leave today unfettered and untethered, so you won’t see anything from me until I return mid-October. In the meantime, don’t forget to look for the Harvest Moon this weekend. God willing, I will be viewing it rising above the Acropolis.

Waiting

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Before I encountered The Pythia, I had been feeling that something was coming, but I didn’t know what it was nor how to find it. In the past, changes in my life had just ‘shown up’. But this felt different and it was taking a very long time. So I began looking for new sources of inspiration. When I found shamanistic practitioner Dr. Steven Farmer on Hay House’s website and learned that he was scheduled to speak in nearby Mountain View, I decided to go.

I’ve been passionate about animals all my life, but I’d never focused on them as spirit guides. If pressed, I would have said that my totem animal was either BUFFALO or RAVEN. A few years back, I was driving along a country road in Washington, and I saw a herd of buffalo. I felt compelled to stop the car and get out for a closer look. I walked up a long driveway to meet them, and they walked over and stared at me as I looked into their eyes. Standing there, the scene from Dances with Wolves where the buffalo are being slaughtered flashed before me, and I felt an overwhelming sadness. Remembering how I had run from the theatre sobbing, I wanted to promise them that nothing like that would ever happen again.

And then there were the ravens. On a trip to the Marin Headlands at the beginning of the year, a raven landed on a post very near me and started gobbling like a turkey. I wanted to photograph him, so I inched closer and closer. Instead of flying off, he just kept gobbling. I didn’t think too much about his vocalizations – I knew there were poultry farms not far off, and having once had a pet crow, I knew that these birds have the ability to mimic a wide range of sounds. But it was unusual.

So, I was excited to hear what Farmer had to say about animals as spirit guides. After talking about his experiences, he chose three people from the audience for readings and I was one of them. Given the choice of voicing a question or just receiving a general reading, I asked about my current confused state.

He invited me to select two cards from his deck of Spirit Guide Oracle Cards. I drew GROUSE and CHIMPANZEE. From these cards, Farmer explained that it would be good for me to engage in dancing and drumming to get my energy moving and to reconnect with the rhythm of life. And as I looked into the depths of his blue eyes, he said, “And I’m getting the word fallow.” He sounded confused, like he didn’t know the meaning of the word. When I prompted him by mentioning soil lying idle for a season, he told me that I needed to rest. I was trying too hard. The journey ahead could not be forced; it would emerge when I was ready.

Since then, I’ve consulted the Spirit Guide Oracle Cards daily, and similar messages to wait and to rest have appeared again and again. And today, during my writing session with Source, I encountered the same advice. More on that tomorrow.Before I encountered The Pythia, I had been feeling that something was coming, but I didn’t know what it was nor how to find it. In the past, changes in my life had just ‘shown up’. But this felt different and it was taking a very long time. So I began looking for new sources of inspiration. When I found shamanistic practitioner Dr. Steven Farmer on Hay House’s website and learned that he was scheduled to speak in nearby Mountain View, I decided to go.

I’ve been passionate about animals all my life, but I’d never focused on them as spirit guides. If pressed, I would have said that my totem animal was either BUFFALO or RAVEN because of experiences I’ve had with these animals.

A few years back, driving along a country road in Washington, I spotted a herd of buffalo. I felt compelled to stop and get out of the car for a closer look. I walked up a long driveway to meet them, and they walked slowly up to the fence to meet me. As I looked into their eyes, the scene from Dances with Wolves where the buffalo are being slaughtered flashed before me, and I felt an overwhelming sadness. Remembering how I had run from the theatre sobbing, I wanted to promise them that nothing like that would ever happen again.

And then there was the raven. On a recent trip to the Marin Headlands, a raven landed on a post very near me and started gobbling like a turkey. I wanted to photograph him, so I inched closer and closer. Instead of flying off, he just kept gobbling. I didn’t think too much about his vocalizations at the time – I knew there were poultry farms not far off, and having once had a pet crow, I knew these birds have the ability to mimic a wide range of sounds. But it was unusual.

So, I was excited to hear what Dr. Farmer had to say about animals as spirit guides. After talking about his experiences as a former psychotherapist and sharing stories about his travels with shamans and his encounters with animals, he chose three people from the audience for readings and I was one of them. Given the choice of voicing a question or receiving a general reading, I asked about my current confused state. He invited me to select two cards from his deck of Spirit Guide Oracle Cards. I drew GROUSE and CHIMPANZEE. From these cards, Farmer explained that it would be good for me to engage in dancing and drumming to get my energy moving and to reconnect with the rhythm of life. And as I looked into the depths of his blue eyes, he said, “I’m getting the word fallow.” He sounded confused, like he didn’t know the meaning of the word. When I prompted him by mentioning soil lying idle, he told me that I needed to rest. I was trying too hard. The journey ahead could not be forced; it would emerge when I was ready.

Since then, I’ve consulted Farmer’s Oracle Cards daily and similar messages have appeared again and again. And today, during my writing session with Source, I encountered the same advice. More on that tomorrow.

All Roads Lead to Greece

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It all started with the oracle cookies. I was Googling around and stumbled upon a chapter from Colette Baron-Reid’s book, Messages From Spirit: The Extraordinary Power of Oracles, Omens, and Signs, in which she describes Aleuromancy, or divination by flour. Intrigued, I read on and learned that the ancient Greeks wrote symbols on pieces of cloth or papyrus and rolled them into dough balls and baked them. The balls were then passed around and questions were asked of the Divine.

I couldn’t stop thinking about the cookies. Colette includes instructions for making a modern version of these confections using a big white bowl, a wooden spoon and a few very specific ingredients. I went back to look over the recipe and a sentence about Apollo and the Delphic Oracle caught my eye. I felt compelled to look up the Oracle immediately, and when I saw the image of the Pythia, I saw myself. I was transfixed.

Priestess of Delphi (1891) John Collier

I immediately did a screen grab of John Collier’s painting and sent it around to five of my closest friends asking them to tell me if they ‘got’ anything from looking at the image. That’s all I said; nothing more. Todd wrote back within five minutes with this: “It’s you, isn’t it?” And a week later when my trusted friend and mentor Angelika finally looked at the image, she started shrieking, “Oh my God! Oh my God!”, and she told me I must go to Delphi, I must go soon, and I must go alone. And as if that wasn’t enough, Dr. Stephanie, a natural clairvoyant and healer, wrote: “Wow! This is a powerful image. I can see you in there––aspects of your strength that were still intact before there was a distortion. Reconnecting with this aspect of yourself will begin to heal the distortion that occurred between then and now.”

I never made the cookies. But I did book my trip to Greece.

Breathing in the Moon

in search of enlightenment